I like to do everything at once. I have a lack of patience. The two days after I got engaged and the shock wore off I went into strict research. I have this business mindset of how everything should work. I think it’s a good to think in terms using words of revenue and expenses. I don’t know how it happened considering I went to bible college. I researched costs, colors, venues, chairs, flowers, favors, and so the wedding list goes on. I even have a secret wedding board on Pinterest! I’ve presented my wedding finances to my parents as if I was selling them car insurance shyly asking for help and how much their willing to give. I have rough drafts for three different plans and I have a book one of my bridesmaids gave to me that says, ‘Dreams Start Here’ I still have multiple pages left to fill and I’ve asked girls I trust who are married the secrets behind this trade called a wedding day. All of them have been so sweet and very detailed. Each of them have given me more than a paragraph to read and I wasn’t expecting them to even take the time of day to respond back to me. All of them have reminded me to plan more for my marriage then the day I get married. They remind me to not lose sight that this day will be the day a new adventure will begin.
Last night, past pure exhaustion and past being overwhelmed I continued to research wedding plans thinking it’d be soothing since I’d be looking for the “fun” things. I started to look for bridesmaid dresses and found a ton of cute ones. I thought I’d start to look for wedding dress examples, worst mistake to do at 11:45 at night. I remind myself a lot of times that I am a girl and I’m crying because I am a girl. I don’t have this perfect dress in mind that every bride speaks of. I just wanted something that I wouldn’t feel insecure in. Wedding dresses do not exist like that unless I want to look like a box. Could a giant white box be cute? I don’t know, my hair is long enough to go topless. I mean the bride is suppose to turn heads right? I’d rather wear my bridesmaid’s dresses.
This morning I was scrolling through my news feed and saw Tori from Marvelous Things Photography post this article titled, “The Most Important Photos to Take at Your Wedding.” Naturally, I needed to let my future wedding photographer to know what her job was so I thought I’d make sure I knew what these photos were. I started crying in my car on King Street when the article wasn’t what I had expected it to be. It was these words that put me to tears before an important meeting in my car..
To photograph your parents, who will hold hands and cry on the first row of the chapel. To photograph your sister dancing with that boy she will marry in three years. To photograph those kids who will grow up so, so quickly. To photograph your grandfather, who will pass away next spring. To photograph your first kiss as a married couple, your best friend busting out her signature dance moves, the flower girl asleep under a table, and maybe even your ex looking pretty wistful as he hugs you a little too long in the receiving line.
You already know: your cake will disappear in less than an hour, your flowers will wilt before the ceremony ends, and that uncomfortable tux will go back to the rental place in the morning. But those photos… they’re gonna be there forever. You’ll have them when your own kids are born, when you have the biggest fight ever with your partner and need to be reminded of how much you really love each other, when your parents pass away and you realize the last time you danced with them was at your wedding…
It reminded me that my Dad will probably pick a country song that I hate to dance with me to, my mom will cry every time I turn to talk to her on my wedding day because she’s been praying for Jared ever since I was 14. It reminded me that one of my sister’s told me she wouldn’t miss my wedding for the world because the Lord has blessed her financially these past couple of years, it reminded me how my forever friends will be standing right behind me on this day helping me by telling me I don’t smell and how you can’t tell how much back sweat I really have and reminding me I really am pretty. It reminded me how precious my ring is and how I will be stepping into a family where I’ll receive three little brothers (even though they aren’t so little) It reminded me that when the day is finished I will walk away as someone’s wife. Not just someone but Jared. I’ll be Jared’s wife and we’ll start our adventure through life together.
To read the full article I’m referring to click here.
These guys are my soundtrack to my day.